no tittle .

"i'm glad to see your changing now,alhamdullilah"

"alhamdullilah, dah tiba masanya"

"at least aku tak rasa aku alone weh,keep it up. semoga kau terus istiqamah"

"kalau aku ada buat silap,tegur weh. aku takut aku tersilap langkah.hihi"

"insyaAllah,sebab nak masuk syurga bukan sensorang tapi sama-sama"

tapi,

bila kau dah decide nak ambik jalan ni, aku tak nafi yang kau akan rasa rindu dengan kau yang 'dulu'. tak nafi yang kau akan rasa letih dengan benda tak biasa kau buat.

tapi,

aku berdoa kita sama sama kuat nak harung jalan ni. terima kasih ya Allah sebab bukak mata aku dengan perubahan dia. sebab terasa akan kelalaian diri .

walaupun perubahan yang kita ambik akan buat orang pandang kita, tapi bertahan lah untuk seketika sebab bila tiba masa orang dah mula terima kita mata tu sendiri akan lari.



“Anugerah yang terindah yang kini kuanggap, adalah saat diriku mulai berubah”

'The Face Underneath The Mask'

I don’t think masks are just designated for people during Halloween, or a superhero, or bank robbers. To be honest, I think that we all wear one for most of our lives; It’s this metaphorical mask that covers up our secrets, our insecurities, and a part of you that you’re too afraid to reveal to the world. You can etch a smile on this mask while the eyes beneath begins to tear up. When you begin to suffocate as it feels like the world is slowly crushing you, it’s easy to deceive people into thinking that everything is okay. This mask becomes the face that people get to know - and in turn, the person underneath becomes buried and almost forgotten.

You wear this mask that is suppose to please people. A mask that fulfills expectations and follows this script on how life is suppose to work that we forget to ask ourselves what we really want or what will make us happy. Sometimes, I even think that we forget that we’re wearing a mask that it’s easy to feel like we have lost ourselves. And sometimes, after wearing the mask for so long, we forget what it covers and become too terrified that you and others won’t like what is underneath. You become afraid that once you’re exposed, you will no longer be able to hide behind anything to escape the cruelty you have witnessed throughout life.

Yet part of you hopes that someone calls you out on all this act that you put on. That someone will remove this mask for you and like what they see. You wish that someone will tell you that you’re not as flawed as you think you are and helps you find yourself again. But most of all, I think we just all want to be able to be truly happy again; to be happy about the face underneath the mask.

#CopyandPaste Cr:Tumblr

Again.

again you make my past come back to me. why ? can i ask you something. hey, do you have a right to bring it up again in my life? i'm trying to learn how to put the past behind me. i'm trying to be strong. i'm trying to be heartless. *sigh*

kalau benda tu tak sakit beratus kali pun aku bagi kau ungkit balik. tapi kau takkan paham macam mana aku rasa . perlu ke nak ungkit benda yang dah lama tu . 'benda lama' tu ada kisah weh . macam mana we stay strong as a friend. oh lupa sebab kau tak pernah duduk tempat kami , sebab tu kau taktau . mungkin kau anggap tu gurauan tapi try duduk tempat aku or at least try to understand me. hurm , mungkin aku yang bodoh sebab mudah percayakan orang .

atau ,

perlu aku bagitau satu dunia yang aku dah takde perasaan tu ? perlu aku mengaku yang salah aku suka pada orang yang tak suka aku ? perlu aku kata yang sakit nya perasaan tu ? perlu aku bagitau yang aku pernah jadi bodoh sebab percayakan kawan, yang tikam aku balik ? perlu ke aku bagitau yang aku struggle nak move on bila orang tu sentiasa ada dengan kita ?

atau ,

kau rasa sanggup nak rasa semua tu .

kadang nampak benda tu simple , tapi dalam hati dia tak sesimple yang kau nampak . luka tu kalau cerita kau boleh kata "eleh benda gitu je pun" tapi perasaan ni complicated. aku pun kalah dengan perasaan aku , kalau ada orang masuk lagi nak huru hara perasaan ni memang la kejam .

please if u dont know about me. please stay silence. dont make my life become complicate bcos you didn't know how i struggle the war of my feeling. get it?

“The past is always tense, the future perfect.” 
― Zadie Smith

"Just because the past taps you on the shoulder, doesn’t mean you have to look back."

sometimes i will to look back and end up with crying alone. i'm really tired to be like this .

the past with him, i'm glad to feel this feeling and we keep stay strong as bestfriend. and wanna make this friendship ever lasting forever . but when i start the new chapter please get along with it.